What is love?  This is a question that’s been asked for as long as we’ve had language, perhaps longer.  During the last decade or two, there has been a great deal written about the biochemistry of love, romance and mating.  We know a great deal now about the different hormones and neurotransmitters involved and scientists have created theories that explain their role in “love.”

We know that dopamine, the neurotransmitter associated with rewards is released when we think about those we love.  Of course, dopamine is also strong in drug addicts.  Love?  Addiction?  Connection?  Sound familiar?  Hmmm.

And then, there is our friend, oxytocin, which is the hormone connected to bonding and attachment.  It stimulates contractions during labor and the ejection of mother’s milk.  It’s is secreted most strongly during orgasm in both men and women.  FYI, the presence of testosterone counteracts the effect of oxytocin.  Make any sense, ladies?

However, can we simplify love into an equation?  And even if we could, do we really want to?  Yes, I have no doubt that if I see a beautiful young woman walking down the street, I might very well feel a hormonal surge and yes that is part of the design to keep the species going.  Absolutely!

And, I’d also like to believe that we’re more than the roughly $4.50 of chemicals our bodies are comprised of. I need to believe that our deepest connections with others is more soulful than mere chemistry.  That’s how I prefer to live my life and it’s how I prefer to work with my couples and singles in improving their lives.  I was an ‘A’ student in chemistry, but I was also an ‘A’ student in psychology.

What you do believe?  I’d really love to hear your opinions and comments on this subject.

Thanks so much,

Dr. Adam Sheck